Real Man?

I just turned 46 years old last month. I've spent the better part of the past year in evaluation mode - call it a prompting from God. I've found these promptings are usually followed by the realization that I don't really understand much at all!

For example, I believe God has called me to be a preacher, teacher and leader in His church. I've worked hard, especially over the past 5 years, to make myself available and be involved in any way I can help out. Mostly it has not turned out at all like I've expected.

1 Tim 3:5 has been hounding me for months: ...if a man does not know how to manage his own household, how will he take care of the church of God?

First I get defensive - Hey I'm a pretty good husband and father! I have a job and put food on the table! Besides, real men get their worth from being good on the job, or in the church...not by what they do at home. What is He trying to say?

What I'm hearing is this - You can't fake the funk at home. Deep down, your kids know who you are by what they have watched you do...and not do...as they grow up under you. Your wife certainly knows who you are by your willingness to sacrificially love her, to nourish her and cherish her (Ephesians). I may not be "bad" in this category, but could I look the Lord in the eyes and say that I gave it my best?...OUCH!  What does it take to be a real man?  Humility is a big factor - willingness to be corrected and take some action as a result.

I feel like God is starting a new chapter in my life. Not sure at all where it is going, but I'm going to try to share some of that experience here with you. I would appreciate hearing your own experiences, or comments on mine.

God Rocks!